7 Tips for End of Semester Stress

You have done it, you have made it through midterms and now the finals are in sight! The pressure is high and your energy is starting to run low. How then can you ensure that you are able to finish your term with as much energy and motivation as you started it with? When do you ask for help, and what kind of help might be available to you?

Though the stress and pressures of a term are predictable, they are no less challenging. Just because we know a marathon is 26.2 miles does not make those final miles any easier for us. The end is challenging and it can be tempting to tell ourselves that, “I knew this was coming, what did I expect?” While saying such things to ourselves is understandable it often is not very helpful. It is important for us to find ways to structure our time so that we are able to finish as strong as we can. Following are 7 tips to help you finish your term as strongly as you can. 

1. You need to sleep! When engaged in learning getting a full night of sleep, meaning at a minimum seven hours, is of the upmost importance. Also, recall that you do not fall asleep the moment your head hits the pillow, you will need time to unwind from the day and to fall asleep. Give yourself at least 30 extra minuets for falling asleep. If you try to skimp on sleep your learning and memory will be negatively impacted. If the goal for the end of the term is to finish well, getting sufficient sleep is one of the most important steps you can take.

2. Plan for problems. When creating time plans we all want to imagine that things will go without issue. If you get sick, or have an accident and you fall behind it can feel impossible to catch up. Plan that there might be problems. If you think a project can be finished in three days give yourself five. This way if you get sick, the project is more difficult than expected, or other situations arise, you have a buffer in your plan to help you overcome the challenge.

3. Have down time. It can seem impossible to allow yourself an hour or two of downtime, yet our unstructured time is vital to our ability to continue to engage with all we need for learning and success. Give yourself at least an hour a day for downtime, and try to take at least one night off a week to spend time with friends or engaging in activities that recharge your batteries.

4. Use your resources. There are many resources available to us, such as office hours, peer tutors, and others. Use the resources that are available to you. Even if you do not have specific questions going to office hours and asking for feedback or other suggestions can be helpful. Also, if you have gotten into the habit of talking with your professor or TA when you don’t need to it makes asking for help when needed much easier than it would be had you never spoken to them before.

5. Keep a schedule. Learning how to structure your own time is a skill that can be difficult to master, yet well worth the effort. When we have all the time in the world to do something we tend not to get it done. When we only have a limited amount of time this added pressure can help to keep us focus and motivated to get the work done. Having a stopping point is important. If you feel as though the task will never end no matter what you do it can be highly demotivating. Give yourself clear start and stop times for your projects.

6. Create dedicated places. Having separate spaces to work, study, and play are important. We want to ensure that we are able to teach ourselves what spaces are for work and what spaces are for play. The psychological term for this is state dependent learning. It’s a big term to indicate that our brain is good at identifying what state it needs to be in using environmental cues. If you are in a room with a TV and holding a video console controller it is time for play, if you are at a desk looking at your monitor it is time for work, sitting in the library with your notes, time to study. Creating these separate environments can help set your brain up for success. Pro tip, if you are able do homework or studying in the room in which you take the class or will be taking the test this helps your brain associate that specific material with that physical location!

7. Manage your time. Time is your most precious and valuable resource. No matter what you do you cannot get more of it. Look at the time you have each week, as your schedule likely changes from day to day too much to create a routine that stays the same from day to day. The time budget is so important the following will focus solely on this topic.

Create a time Budget

Learning how to manage, or budget, your time can be one of the most helpful skills that you can have at your disposal. Time budges allow us to have a better understanding of how much time we have to give to different tasks and help us create reasonable expectations for our day to day activities. A time budget is often something that shifts depending on where you are in the term. Early in the term it might be easy to give hours to a hobby or socializing, while at the end of the term more time might need to go into studying. 

With a time budget look at your week, not just your day. Calculate how many hours you need for sleep (ideally at least 56 per week), how many hours you are in class, how many hours working, and so on. Once you have an idea of how many hours you have left in a week put in how much of that time you want to spend on tasks such as studying, being active, socializing, and hobbies. Leave a few hours every week that are unaccounted for as some tasks will take longer than expected and others might go by faster. 

Use the following as a sample time budget:

If when you get to the end of your time budget and you realize you physically cannot do all that you need see what if anything can be removed. You might have to quit your job, or take fewer shifts so that you can get your work done. If you feel as though you cannot cut out anything further perhaps it is time to ask for help. Take your time budget to your professors and show them the challenges you are facing. If they can see that you are being intentional with your time and taking accountability they might be more willing to offer extensions or other aids. 

Therapy too can help during the end of the year. A therapist can help you go through a time budget and help you plan for how to get all the things you need done accomplished by the end of the term. Therapy can also help you with learning how to communicate challenges you are having with others. Your school’s counseling office likely has therapists on hand that can help or can help you find providers that can help meet your specific needs.

The Four Pillars of Health

Physical and mental health are connected. If we treat our bodies poorly it is likely that our mental health will suffer as well. Likewise if your mental health is poor you also are likely struggling to care for yourself physically. When meeting with clients for the first time assessing healthy behaviors is a priority. The four behaviors I focus on I refer to as the four pillars of health. These behaviors are the right amount of sleep, healthy diet, being physically active, and doing things we enjoy with people we enjoy. If any of the pillars are out of alignment it is likely that our mental health will be negatively impacted. Let us examine each of these pillars with greater detail.

Sleep

Getting restful restorative sleep is vitally important to our overall health and wellbeing. The absolute minimum sleep that an adult should be averaging per night is seven hours. Many adults get less sleep than that. Teenagers often need closer to a minimum of eight or nine hours per night. Though recommending getting more sleep seems like minimal recommendation it is surprising how many people are chronically sleep deprived. 

There are several small adjustments that people can make to help improve their sleep that are referred to as sleep hygiene behaviors. Such behaviors include getting up around the same time each day, sleeping in a quiet and dark space, only using the bed for sleep and sex, not eating right before bed, and not consuming caffeine for at least eight hours before bed. The last might be a surprising recommendation, the half life of caffeine is six hours so if someone is having sleeping problems it would be advisable for them to avoid caffeine for closer to ten hours before they wish to be asleep.

There are disorders that can be disruptive of sleep. Some are more psychological in nature while others are medically based. If you are having difficulty with sleep it can be important to understand if the nature of your problem is more behavioral (psychological) or medical in nature. Medical sleep problems would include sleep apnea, narcolepsy, restless leg syndrome and so on. Behavioral sleep problems can include insomnia, or sleep problems that are secondary to another condition such as anxiety or depression. Therapy can help with many of these problems even if they are not behavioral in nature as often the treatment involves behavioral changes. 

Diet

I am not a dietitian and thus cannot make recommendations for a specific style of diet. Eating a healthy diet does not mean following one specific diet that is better than all others. In general terms eating healthy consists of eating fruits and vegetables, limiting processed foods and limiting sugar intake. For some this might be eating a vegetarian diet, for others a mediterranean diet, while for others using Adkins or weight watchers. None of the above are any better than the others, the best diet is one that a person can stick to and follow. 

A few tricks and techniques that can assist with diet include, don’t buy food that you know is not healthy/good for you. It is amazing how often we can know that having a food item such as chips in the house will increase the likelihood that we will eat more of them then we mean to. Our past behaviors are the best indicators of future behavior. If you know that you are a person who has a very difficult time with having certain food items in the home, do not buy those items. 

Eat mindfully. Often when we eat we are not attending to the food that we are eating. We are watching a show or reading something on our phones while eating then are surprised when our food is gone. When you are eating pay attention to your food. Actually experience the taste, the texture, the smells etc. Eat slowly and enjoy the food that you are eating. We know from research that we tend to eat slower when we have taken time to prepare a meal. Make food that you enjoy eating, then take the time and attention to enjoy that food. Eating is a pleasure and it can do much to lift our spirits if we pay attention to eating. 

Give yourself permission to eat food. If you are wanting to cut certain foods out of your life try instead to limit or adjust them rather than giving them up all together. When we make a rule for ourselves that we are not allowed to have food X, suddenly all we want to eat is food X. If though we allow ourselves to have food X but with some stipulations, such as needing to make it ourselves, or substituting ingredients it can become much easier to adhere to our diet. For example if one wants to decrease eating pizza, perhaps rather than saying that they will have no pizza, it is they can have pizza that is home made and has healthy ingredients as toppings. 

Physical Activity

Physical health is an important aspect of one’s overall health and wellbeing. For many thinking of physical activity invokes images of being at a gym or engaging in fitness classes. Going to the gym is not the only method of being healthy and active, you can do so by taking daily walks, playing games such as Switch Sports, or Just Dance. Getting your heart rate up for about fifteen minuets twice a day is a great place to start. 

Also recall that physical activity does not have to feel punching. In fact it is more effective if it can feel rewarding and enjoyable. Playing a pick up game of basket ball, going for a bike ride with a friend, taking an exercise class, all of these things can be fun and enjoyable while also being physically engaging. 

Social Hobbies 

Doing things that matter with the people we care about can do wonders for our mental health. Simply being with people you love and care about can be helpful, but if we are doing a shared activity that can really help us feel more connected, wanted, and accepted. Doing things can be as simple as playing a board game, or walking around window shopping. Or we can make the events as complex as going on a multi day hike, or weekend trip. If you are feeling down trying to find an activity to do with your friends where each person’s participation enhances the experience. This might be an escape room or even doing a potluck dinner. No matter the activity, as long as it is something you typically enjoy, being around those you care about will help you feel just a little better.

Bringing Them Together

If your energy tanks are low try combining several of the pillars at once. This way you are hitting several areas of self-care with one activity. This could be something such as going on a hike and picnic trip with your friends. This way you are being active, social, and feeding your body. Or perhaps your friends come over for a dinner party followed by a game night. Again we are hitting social and food. 

If you are someone who tends to ignore your own pillars of health try to create ways to ensure that you are attending to the four pillars in your day to day life. Schedule regular social events with friends. Build being physically active into your daily routine. Set reminders to help ensure that you are going to bed on time. Buy healthy snacks and food and try to avoid the foods you know don’t help you feel good. Also, keep a list of activities that you can do to attend to the four pillars of health as when you are feeling bad it can be more difficult to make plans. 

Know When to Get Help

If you are attending to your four pillars and still do not feel well it might be time to reach out and see someone for therapy. Tips about knowing when to get help can be found in my previous blog post here. Remember like anything maintenance is better than fixing a problem. Keep up with your self-care and seek assistance when needed.

Knowing When to Get Help

You feel swamped, overwhelmed, you don’t even know where to start. You want help, you realize you need help, but the thought of trying to go about getting help is overwhelming. What kind of help do you need? How do you know you are getting someone ‘good’ and what does a good therapist even look like? 

For the sake of this article help does not necessarily mean psychological help. As you go through the steps listed below you might realize you need someone to help out around the home more, or that you need more assistance with work. While talk therapy certainly can help you practice how to go about advocating for your needs at the end of the day you will still need to ask for the appropriate help in the setting in which you need it. So while this article will focus on when to ask for talk therapy it is important to note that the help you require might be different! 

When we are stressed out and feeling overwhelmed we often know that getting help would likely be the best thing for us to do. The problem is we are already stretched too thin and have no mental resources left to ask for help with. It can be very difficult finding the time to get help and honestly likely help was needed much before you reached this moment. Let us take the time to examine how to get help before you are burned out, how to access care when you are burned out, and how to set yourself up to get help when needed in the future.

Getting Help Before You Burn Out

Prevention is always going to be easier than fixing a problem that has gotten big. How though do we know when we need help? Our minds do not have a check engine light that lets us know its time to go in and seek care (though likely many of us would just ignore this as we do with our cars!). Learning how to check in with yourself and understanding your clues can be highly beneficial for knowing how and when to reach out for help.

Check in with the people who care about you. Ask them what clues they notice when you are starting to get overwhelmed. Often we have external cues that demonstrate how we are feeling. For example, I clue in to my stress level by noting how often I’m sighing. It’s not uncommon to need to learn how to recognize your warning signs. Take time to check in with yourself to see what signs of stress you can make note of and used to gage how stressed out you are.

USING A CALENDAR 

Keeping track of what you have going on can be a powerful tool for understanding when you need help. Keeping all of your appointments and important dates in one place can seem crowded and overwhelming it is important as you can physically see when you have times of high stress coming. Seeing that you have a week with big deadlines, important events for family and also other projects can help you realize that you need to have more in your energy tank for that week, or can help you move some things around if you are able. 

Keeping such a calendar can also help you with self-advocacy in a work environment. If your job has a lot of deadlines that are all coming up at one it can be helpful to show a manager what is going on and to discuss how all the deadlines being at once can negatively impact your quality of work. It can also be a useful tool within a family setting for discussing chores or other family related events and getting others in the household to step in and assist. 

WRITE DOWN YOUR PROJECTS 

Sometimes things we are working on do not warrant being on the calendar list. This can be household items such as laundry or perhaps we are working on a part of a project that is ongoing. As our calendar is not full that week it might be difficult to recognize that you are stressed out. Taking a moment to write out all of the projects that you are working on can be very helpful when trying to understand how much strain you might be under. A good way to approach the list is to write everything out, then to ask yourself if a friend told you this was all they were working on would you consider it to be too much? If the answer is yes then likely you have too much going on and can use some help. 

ANNUAL CHECKINS 

We go for physicals annually, why not plan on going to see a therapist annually as well? Checking in with a mental health provider once or twice a year can help be a place to check in to ensure that you are not doing too much and that you are staying on track for personal and/or professional goals. Also if you are in the habit of checking in with a professional regularly it can increase the chances of booking an appointment between regular visits when needed. Having a therapist that you are familiar with and trust greatly decreases the stress involved with finding help when needed. 

Knowing Burnout

Burnout is not a clinical term. It is the term that we often use to explain the mental fatigue that comes from doing too much or having too many demands on our time and/or resources. Our lives are filled with many mental tasks, such as managing our calendar, keeping track of projects, social engagement, care taking, and so on. All of these tasks can start to pile up and become overwhelming. 

Some signs that you are reaching burn out can include forgetfulness, not feeling rested upon waking, difficulty with focus and/or concentration, irritability, disinterest in activities. Though the above are common signs from burnout everyone is different and how burnout presents for you might be different. If you are starting to experience any of the above you likely need help. What type of help though? 

TALK WITH YOUR FRIENDS AND FAMILY

If your friends and family are the type to want to help reach out to them. Let them know that you have been feeling down, or overwhelmed. Also, tell them what you need. Sometimes we just need to process what is happening in our lives and do not want solutions. Often when we are discussing problems we are having the other person will want to find ways to solve those problems. Tell the person what you want or need from the interaction. Saying something such as; “I’m going through a lot right now and I would love to talk through it all with you, I don’t really want suggestions on what to do, I more just need to process it all with you” can help to ensure that both of you are getting what you want out of the situation.

Your friends and family also might be able to help you with what is going on. They maybe have ideas or can take over projects for you. Think about their offer and if you want to accept their help or not. There can be times where we want to keep all of our projects, but knowing when and how to delegate or step away from something can be beneficial. 

TALKING TO A THERAPIST

Therapists, to include psychologists, councilors, and social workers, are specifically trained on how to help people going through difficult times. Working with a therapist does not mean that something is wrong with you or that you are crazy. It might be helpful to think of therapy as consolation for your brain and behaviors. Therapists are behavioral experts and their help can do wonders for helping you learn how to manage the different challenges in your life. 

Preventing Future Burnout

As noted above prevention is going to be easier than treatment. There are a few behaviors that we can engage in that help to decrease the chances of burning out. Creating habits that include these behaviors can help prevent future burnout.

LEARNING TO SAY NO

Often one of the biggest problems we can have is taking on too many tasks. Whether this be at home or at work if people know that we will say ‘yes’ to whatever is asked, they will not ask others. Learning how to simply say ‘no’ is a powerful tool in preventing burnout. 

Saying no can be difficult for some. One way to help ease yourself into saying no is through asking for time. Saying “Let me check with my schedule first to ensure I have enough time to dedicate to this” can really help with stepping to a no. Also, during that time the person might find someone else to do the task.

Another tool that you can utilize is to have a ‘no committee.’ A no committee is a group of people who will default to helping you say no to new projects. You have to provide them with a compelling argument as to why you can take on the new task. If you are unable to persuade the no committee that this tasks is something you can take on can help you better know when to say no. 

KEEPING TRACK OF TASKS

Keeping an up to date list of all the projects that you are working on can help you know if you are able to take on new tasks or not. Keep such a list and update it weekly. There are many programs or applications that one can use to help keep track of projects. Having such lists can also help you communicate achievements at work or school. As noted above if the list of projects is one where you would tell a friend it’s too much, it is too much for you as well, take a few things off the list and bring them back once other things are completed. 

SCHEDULE SELF-CARE

Self-care can take many forms. How we care for ourselves looks very different from person to person. Keep regular self-care as part of your weekly or monthly routine. It is also worth saying that you need to keep the self-care appointments that you make. Often when we get busy we tend to cut out self-care first. Self-care is not an indulgence, it is needed time to ensure that you have the mental resources needed to complete all of your other tasks. 

KEEPING THE FOUR PILLARS OF HEALTH

Keeping the four pillars of health is imperative for everyone. The four pillars are, getting enough sleep, eating a healthy diet, exercising, and doing what you enjoy with people you enjoy. For each it does not need to be too complicated for checking in. 

Sleep should be a minimum of seven hours per night. For diet you want to ensure that you are eating fruits and vegetables and avoiding excessive amounts of sugar. For exercise try to get at least thirty minuets of moderate activity four times a week. Ensure that you are taking time to do fun activities with your friends at least one time weekly. If you are doing all of the above and still not feeling well, that is defiantly a sign that it is time to get help. 

Final Thoughts

Knowing when to get the approbate help can be difficult. Finding ways to check in with yourself and to create regular checkups can be great tools. Remember it is not uncommon to not realize you are doing too much until you are feeling completely overwhelmed. It takes time to learn your own personal boundaries but it is an important skill to learn and will help prevent future burnout.